Peer pressure is a relatively well-known concept, at least to those of us who navigated the choppy waters of high school social circles. At the same time, there are two distinct types of peer pressure—positive and negative—our purposes here call for the focus on one only. Negative peer pressure can be either direct or indirect or otherwise stem from environmental norms. Villiness (2022) defines peer pressure as “the fact that peers can pressure one another to engage in certain behaviors—both positive and negative.” Friends often pressure individuals to use substances as a way to gain acceptance. If children place value on peer acceptance or are otherwise sensitive to the potential of being rejected by others, they may be particularly susceptible to the effects of this phenomenon. Young people who experience peer pressure may willingly engage in substance use to avoid ostracism or judgment. It’s also worth noting that peer pressure can contribute to substance use more subtly, particularly when it involves normalizing the presence and use of substances within a particular environment.
Ways to Help Your Child Deal With Peer Pressure:
● Help your child understand what true, healthy friendships look like, and help them understand that these relationships won’t involve pressures of any sort. ● Teach your child not only how to be independent but also what it means to be independent, especially when it comes to thinking and acting. ● Help your child prepare for instances in which they may encounter peer pressure by teaching them the ability to say “no” and by modeling this skill in your everyday life. ● Instruct your child to avoid impulsivity, instead stopping and thinking before making decisions, especially those presented or influenced by their peers. ● Talk to your child about the consequences of giving in to peer pressure, and help them understand the impact that negative, peer-influenced behaviors can have on them and the people around them.
Peer Pressure Scripts
One of the most effective ways to help your child prepare for and eventually combat peer pressure is to roleplay instances in which they may encounter this phenomenon. In doing so, you teach them “refusal skills” they can use should the need arise. Some of the best refusal skills with which to endow your child include the following:
● Asking questions when pressured into using or taking substances. These questions should pertain to why the substance is being used, why your child should use it, and if it’s really worth it. ● Saying “no” with conviction and reinforcing it with a positive, affirming statement solidifies your child’s contentment with their choice. ● Not hesitating to reiterate the decline of substances. ● Using the buddy system to find another person who will support them in their decisions. ● Understanding that statements glorifying substances or normalizing them are incorrect and provocative. ● Speaking up when they spot someone pressuring them, or indeed, pressuring someone else. ● Evaluating the worth of maintaining relationships in which peer pressure manifests with whatever frequency. ● Citing their parents’ rules and values when pressured into using substances. If need be, this can be extended to using parents as an excuse. ● Understanding that they are their own independent person and that they can make their own decisions without having to give in to someone else’s influence. ● Come up with sample sentences ahead of time and subsequently implement them when confronted with peer pressure.
Preventing your child from using substances will never be easy. However, the more you understand why they may turn to drugs and alcohol and what you can do to stop this from happening, the greater your chances of success will be. Educating yourself about the concept of substance abuse and all it entails is the first step. Once this knowledge is in place, you can start taking more actionable steps to identify potential dangers in your child’s life and help them deal with or avoid falling into these traps.
